Thursday, May 05, 2005

Happy Birthday Mom, I Suck

So, I bought my mother - and my husband's mother, and my step-mother - birthday cards instead of Mothers' Day cards. I figure, having to read the crap that they put in the MD cards is much worse than getting a BD card for the holiday. Don't get me wrong: I appreciate all these women and want to make sure to mark the (contrived) holiday at least so they'll know I remembered them. Actually, I appreciate them enough not to bore them with the ridiculously florid and sappy language that would NEVER come out of my mouth.

The step-mother is gonna think it's funny. She's no fan of Hallmark (though the best thankyou note writer in the world). Hopefully the other mothers will get the joke and not be insulted by the reality that I just got to the freakin' store too late to snatch up the funny or sincere cards.

In my typical birthordered sangfroid, I'd wager that my goofy brother doesn't even remember - he never does. And then my stupid card'll look great!!!!

2 comments:

bean said...

Be sure and get some of those sappy mother's day cards to send to them on their birthdays...

heh. heh.

Anonymous said...

Once at my horrible old job, it was some kind of occasion for which I was supposed to get my boss a card. I forget what, exactly. So a coworker and I went across the street to Walgreens and got her a super-sappy card that said, "For Your Graduation, Grandson..."

I seem to recall her totally not finding it funny. She was a terrible boss.